Well the school holidays are done and dusted, and we are back at the day in and day out routine of life during the school term.
Even if you don't have kids in school yet, the reality is that there are many pre-school activities that take a break during the holidays, and get back to action after this time.
And this roundabout of continuation of routine, the business of life, the mental load... these can all lead to Burnout.
Let's take a look at burnout!
Burnout is 'a condition characterised by intense exhaustion related to parenting, emotional distancing from one's children, and a loss of parental fulfilment' (Mikolojczak and Roskam, 2020).
In light of the hectic times that we saw with Covid in 2020, and in some places in the world are still seeing, this burnout of parents, who were expected to homeschool and work especially, it caused a huge increase in burnout.
Like me... some parents found the decrease in rushing around quite good... but I also as an essential worker,...
Easter has been and gone, and here we are!! I love school holidays... except for when its chaotic and I'm scrambling. As a working mum, trying to lose the mum guilt and embrace the fun and the relax is really important to me.
We definitely lead a bit of a full throttle life with after school activities, so really try to pare it back for holidays.
But surviving and thriving aren't the same thing, and as I get asked this a lot, I thought I'd share my hot tips on making school holidays a great connection time, not just another two weeks to survive!
You may have heard me ramble on a bit about this, but letting your kids lead the way can be really empowering for them. The movie YES Day is an extreme example of this, one that I totally love, and whilst I've not done the whole day like they do, I do try to weave it in. Giving your kids full throttle on how to lead and navigate something that is normal...
There is so much misconception about our brain and the fabulous changes it goes through during matrescence. In the first 6 months postpartum we actually get more stuff in our brain, that gives us our mum power. It increases connectivity for us to connect with our new child.
There is a thought out there that we get baby-brain... but its such a lie.
We get baby connection brain - we get a brain boost that supports ourselves to connect and realise the needs of this new human we have brought into the world.
Our brain, on purpose, knowingly shifts our attention to other areas of our life, like looking after our baby and being hyper-aware of their needs, so of course we lose focus on other parts of our world.
This is normal.
There is nothing wrong with you.
You don't need a supplement to 'fix yourself' or 'make it better'.
Your body is doing exactly what it needs to do at that exact time for survival of your family.
Yes ... sleep helps.
As does enough water and...
I remember when I had my first child. And she would seem to get into a routine, and then POW... it would all shift.
And I blamed myself for this. I thought I was doing something wrong, or maybe I should have more information, there was a way around this that I hadn't quite figured out yet.
A few of my girlfriends who had kids before me told me it was normal. And not to stress... but this didn't really help me either.
And surprisingly at this time, even with all of my paediatric knowledge and my work with babies and their mum's, I couldn't step outside of the situation to see that it was normal. That I wasn't doing anything wrong. That there wasn't anything wrong with my babe. That is was just the journey of these first few months.
So I thought I would pen all about leaps, what they are, and what the may look like. If you have access to the Wonder Weeks app, then you can generally follow along there to get some great info on what is happening. When you are living it however, it...
THOSE FIRST MOMENTS
Welcome to the world of Motherhood.
You are here, it's intense... and you have been told to love it, no matter what. And that you will ultimately love your brand new baby more than anything else. In the Whole World. EVER!
But what if you don't?
Does this make you a bad mum. Does this make you a failure.
I'm going to let you in on a little secret.
I didn't totally fall in love with my firstborn on day 1. I appreciated her divineness, and I was immediately protective, but I didn't get those lashingly large love feelings for a little while.
And it took me a long time to realise that didn't make me a failure or a bad mum.
Especially when, with my second, I did. I'm the same human, how was it different?
Sometimes your birth can play a big part to your connection. For me, this was it.
But for some mum's, the love grows over time. And this is NORMAL. Don't beat yourself up about that one.
Your little babe will suckle on your breast at some stage, often...
Throughout humanity, we haven't been so great at supporting our mothers. In fact, it has, in my opinion been one of our greatest failings. We try our very best to support our mothers in pregnancy, but as soon as baby is born, it's all about baby.
And I get that, gosh they are darn cute. In fact, I still get all ovary-clicking when I see a newborn. But now I like to see how I can best support the mother. How I can help make this journey into motherhood easier for them.
Matrescence - What it is? How does it changes us? What we can actually expect as women in this process? How can we begin to support each other through this important time?
Matrescence is the process of becoming a mother - where a woman transitions through pre-conception, pregnancy and birth, surrogacy or adoption, to the postnatal period and beyond.
Becoming a mum brings changes physical, psychological and emotional changes, continual growth and naturally some struggles.
Fostering awareness of...
The concept of self awareness for mothers is a big one, as it can often lead to a recognition of elements of our motherhood journey which frustrate us.
The way that these frustrations, and overwhelm, can impact our health are significant. This impact can be life changing. This is a conversation for another time.
So back to self-awareness.
This is defined as "Conscious knowledge of ones own character and feelings".
As a mum, this can be a tough one to get a handle on. Because having a conscious awareness about anything to do with our self can be terribly difficult. It can be difficult to think of anything outside of our little people bubble, outside of where we are at, where we should be, and that interminable to-do list in our head.
An ability to tap into a conscious knowledge of our feelings can easily be put to the bottom of the aforementioned to-do list, and thus, it never gets reached.
As mothers, we are so conditioned by society that we don't matter, that what we think and...
Christmas is over for another year.... and we've all made it. JUST!
2020 has definitely been a year right... our resilience stores have been tested like no other, and we have had to find ways to face days that we couldn't think we could face. For many of us, throw in motherhood to this rite of passage, and particularly a shout out to all the new mum's of 2020, navigating a journey that was never intended to be traversed solo being thrust at us solo.
But let's just dwell on Christmas! There are so many elements of Christmas that make it a tough road for the fairer sex. The organisation, the cooking, the present buying. I see a lot of meme's getting thrown around about the dad's getting let off easy and getting as much as a surprise as the kids on christmas morning.... and all of this is true in some or all parts.
Some of us have limped to the line... dragged ourselves along and barely felt...
What a big week it is... the awareness of supporting parents of newborns through the huge steps of the shift into Parenthood. This week it's all about PANDA... Perinatal Anxiety and Depression Awareness.
The organisation panda.org.au do an amazing job of bringing much needed awareness to this problem, and the support services they offer are exceptional. Interestingly, there are many unheard of statistics that relate to the stigma of anxiety and depression in this stage of your life.
Did you know:
Up to 1 in 3 Mums experience the birth of their baby as Traumatic
Up to 1 in 5 expecting or new mums will be affected by anxiety or depression
As many as 1 in 10 expecting or new dads will too
Across Australia, 100,000 families will be impacted each year
A significant number of Non-birth parents experience similar rates of mental illness.
I see this everyday in practice. The mums and dads coming in with the brave face of new parenthood. Wearing the mask that...