Matrescence

Uncategorized Mar 05, 2021

Throughout humanity, we haven't been so great at supporting our mothers. In fact, it has, in my opinion been one of our greatest failings. We try our very best to support our mothers in pregnancy, but as soon as baby is born, it's all about baby.

And I get that, gosh they are darn cute. In fact, I still get all ovary-clicking when I see a newborn. But now I like to see how I can best support the mother. How I can help make this journey into motherhood easier for them. 

Matrescence - What it is? How does it changes us? What we can actually expect as women in this process? How can we begin to support each other through this important time?

Matrescence is the process of becoming a mother -  where a woman transitions through pre-conception, pregnancy and birth, surrogacy or adoption, to the postnatal period and beyond.

Becoming a mum brings changes physical, psychological and emotional changes, continual growth and naturally some struggles. 

Fostering awareness of matrescence and a bigger sense of community for our beautiful mothers through this journey is most important. 

Over the years there have been some really standout ways that I loved to be supported when I had young kids, or that mum's have told me they really appreciate. 

1. Hold my baby so I can have a shower/go to the bathroom/rest my arms, look after myself however I may need.

2. Acknowledge my tears in the first few weeks are normal, and sit with me, without telling me it's normal. I know that... but it's hard work and I just want a non-judgemental being with me when it happens.

3. Cook me some food, bring some dinner over, or a cake or something that makes it a bit easier for me to learn this new mum thing.

4. Entertain my toddler, without me having to say exactly what they need.

5. Let me have a sleep in the middle of the day.

6. Help me hang out the washing. Or wash it, or somehow make that part of my world a bit easier.

7. Tell me about positive experiences you have had in your motherhood... but keep some of those horror stories to yourself, because at the outset I'm fragile and I don't need to hear those.

8. Support me through a tough day by just listening to my rant... not trying to solve it, but being a supportive ear.

9. Acknowledging I may be grieving my old life, and I may also be revelling in my new motherhood, all at the same time.

10. Laugh with me.

11. Help me move my body, encourage me to walk, or a small 10 minute yoga, or something that changes up my physical self to change my day.

This list is by no means exhaustive, there are many more ways we can support our mothers whether it is their very 1st baby or their 2nd, 3rd, 4th or 5th! 

With much Mama love,

Dr Ali

Chiro, Mama, Lover of the future Mama living inside each of you!

 

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