So pretty much the information I get from the mums I'm speaking to is either.... oh shit, how can I do this, through to I love this space so much, I need the rest.
And I know when my kids were younger, the decrease in organised activities and interactions with other crazy toddlers definitely sent me a bit batty. As they've got older, I've found some relaxed rules, embracing of calm and downtime has been a blessing.
But, it has taken me years to recognise this one thing.... I need the rest too.
All the running around, the doing of the things, the ferrying from A to B and trying to work, it wears me out. And I'm not getting any younger .
In saying that, when I look after me, I can deal with a whole lot more. And that is the whole point of unfck motherhood... to open up the concept of the 5 Pillars of Health for Mum's. To give you the chance to see that you don't have to deprive yourself of all the stuff you love to be healthy.
Here's my Top 5 Tips for thriving in the holidays!
Who's with me... School Holidays can be totally amazing.... or a logistical nightmare!
Even if your kids are younger than school age, often the regular activities you participate in change or stop, and those bloody big kids turn up at all the playgrounds.
But aren't the school holidays crazy... like we should be making all of these magical experiences to turn them into unicorn days of fond childhood memories.
How we have an internal dialogue that can drive our expectation, our feelings of what we are supposed to be doing, and shake us up a bit to feel like intensivity with our children is vital.
So I have a few questions for you...
What if we allowed our kids to get bored?
What would it look like for them to explore all THE STUFF that they may have in their spaces?
Recently, I spent the weekend away with my glorious tribe of supportive business women, and it was all sorts of fabulous.
It's been a while since I've been surrounded by the glorious positivity of a bunch of women who are all striving for the most for themselves and their communities.
And it has really got me thinking about the power of tribe.
As mum's, there are so many external influences telling us all of the ways to do all of the things... and this is loud and noisy and overwhelming at best.
Our tribe is sometimes like this.
When it supports us.
When we need enveloping.
When we need encouraging.
It is also sturdy and strong.
It bands behind you in the face of adversity.
It supports you quietly and firmly when it needs too.
Your tribe matters!
Recreating a space and tribe for women to explore this whole motherhood game, and how to exist in this journey of motherhood is so important.
I speak with mums every day who feel lost, and my heart...
I hope you are buckled in...
I want to chat about the patriarchy - a concept that I wasn't aware of much before I started deep diving into motherhood.
How does society shape our motherhood, and where this comes from?
How did this become the picture of what a good mother is.... or the perfect mother myth?
Why do we stay there as a society?
So these are big questions. And I want to just touch on the subjects a little (we do dive deeply into this in the 6 Week Mama Reset).
Patriarchy is defined as "a system of society or government in which the father or eldest male is head of the family and descent is reckoned through the male line - a system of society or government in which men hold the power and women are largely excluded from it."
Just reading this makes my heart skip a little, like who decided the men rule the roost? Who decides that they could hold the power.
I was reminded of this acutely in the motherhood sphere, in the role that an expat mum experienced the...
Well didn't last week hit me for a six. Like literally, I felt like total shit. I had laryngitis, and I had to reschedule patients for the first time in nearly 20 years in practice, cray cray.
Like many of you I'm sure, I pride myself on my general immunity. I'm resilient, I'm strong, and I don't have time to get sick... right!
Well maybe that was the problem last week for me. I hadn't prioritised my down time, and the start of this year has been busy, and a bit stressy too!
For those of you thrown back into Victorian lockdown, I can't even imagine the extra level that this is placing on your stress load.
But why should our stress matter? How does it impact on immunity. Let me give you a little mama lesson!
Immunity is strongly linked to our stress response. When we get stressed, we have this part of our brain called the amygdala which redirects all of our focus to the things we are stressed about. Part of this also causes our cortisol to be released.
Cortisol is a hormone.
I've been reflecting on our amazing brain, and how awesome it is to navigate motherhood with us. So I thought I'd share with you some of the ways that our brain totally has our self.
Before I do that though... a bit of reflection. Because what are those things that society tells us about our brain or our smarts as we progress into motherhood:
Well, let me tell you Mama, your brain is so much more than that, and so are YOU!
Our Amazing Mama Brain 100% has our back. During pregnancy our brain does a pretty amazing think, it shrinks our grey matter down. Don't be alarmed by this, because this is a good think. Our brain goes through a process of streamlining. This occurs in specific areas that relate to social cognition, empathy and...
How can you create healthy shifts in our motherhood experience when life, for many, often feels stressed, too rushed, too busy and way too many tabs open?
Dr Ali's shares her top 6 tips for shifting your internal experience to shape and influence your external experience, that are game changes for both your health and motherhood.
This is one of the hardest parts of health, because as a Mum, once we have kids choosing ourselves is hard. And we've also been told it's selfish. But bringing conscious awareness and choices to mothering, about your needs as well as those of who you are caring for, is vital.
If you are ready to gain easy tools that make it simple to reclaim, re-energise and discover your sense of self again the MotherHOOD is here and ready for you!
Movement is more than keeping you trimmer and thinner. It's important for your brain, your stress load, your adaptability and resilience. There are quick and...
I stumbled across this picture on the weekend, and it got me thinking. It got me thinking about two things...
To me it highlights how, in our society these days, they are so often intrinsically linked for mothers. We often crave calm (or at least those women in the 6 Week Mama Reset and who are rolling into The Mother Hood do), it's that inner silence where we don't have immediate external expectations coupled with our inner to do list seemingly under control.
Yet as mums, reaching for calm can often lead us to loneliness.... to have it we have to be away from what is creating the busy - and this can lead to your loneliness.
We have to be seperate.
Especially when we are in the throes of the first few years. When the often relentless requirement to be mum leaves little time for calm creation... unless we move to a seperate space... where the loneliness can creep in.
Loneliness is in epidemic proportions apparently. According to the Australian Institute...
If you've seen my insta stories, you would know that we have had a long weekend, and we've all been a bit tired. And that's me too.
I don't have a crazy level of go that some have, and I need a reset too. Just like you.
So this weekend I took some downtime to nap and do yoga. We went to Beef Week to look at some cows, and we moved our bodies a little bit.
I drank coffee and read the paper with my husband, I cooked some yummy food, and I did things that nurtured my soul. A lot. Because that's what I needed.
As mum's, there is a great perception of weakness if we acknowledge that we need rest too. It's not weak. It's human. I applaud you for recognising this about yourself.
It can be really hard to acknowledge, but also really hard to make it happen. Because the list is never finished. Somehow, trying to forget the list and get it happening is key.... and one way I do that is to write it all down, get it out of my brain, and then this free's up more space to do...
I always find myself super reflective on ANZAC Day each year. Like many of you, I have family members and friends who have joined the armed forces and served to protect our rights as Australians.
Having watched both of my grandfathers, and my uncle, and in more recent times some school mates return from overseas postings, the support that they get is extremely important for their ongoing recovery from any trauma they may have experienced.
I'm always full of all the feels, because I feel as a general population, our understanding of the impact this has on our service men and women is mammoth!
And not to devalue this at all, but it also gets me in reflection mode for our mum's too. Because we are undervalued, we are 'just mum's, and we are not working when we are in the home... right???
One of the ways that I was able to navigate my motherhood through those days where I really wanted to throw in the towel was with my women.
The BF who I could call for any reason.